英語(yǔ)幽默笑話帶翻譯的
1 、A young couple was on their way to get married when they had an accident and died. Now they were in front of St. Peter and the young lady asked if they could get married. St. Peter told them, he would have to get back to them with an answer. Around 30 days later St. Peter returns and tells the couple that they can get married in heaven. The young lady then asks St. Peter, “If things just don't work out can we get a divorce?" St. Peter looks at her and replies, " Lady it took me 30 days to find a preacher up here do you really think I am going to find a lawyer?!!"
一對(duì)年輕的夫婦在去結(jié)婚的路上出了車禍，雙雙死去了。于是，他們來(lái)到了圣徒彼得面前，妻子問(wèn)是否她還可以和丈夫結(jié)婚，圣徒彼得告訴他們，關(guān)于這個(gè)問(wèn)題他一有了結(jié)果就會(huì)回來(lái)找他們。差不多30天以后，圣徒彼得回來(lái)了，并且告訴他們可以在天堂結(jié)婚。妻子又問(wèn)：“如果生活的不愉快，我們可不可以離婚呢?”圣徒彼得看著她，回答說(shuō)：“夫人，我花了30天才找到個(gè)傳教士，難道你真的希望我再去找個(gè)律師嗎?”
2、On my first day of classes at my university I took a front-row seat in my literature course. The professor told us we would be responsible for reading five books, and that he would provide us with a list of authors from which we could choose. Then he ambled over to the lectern, took out his class book and began, "Baker, Black, Brooks, Carter, Cook..." I was working feverishly to get down all the names when I felt a tap on my shoulder. The student in back of me whispered, "He's taking attendance."
大學(xué)的第一天，文學(xué)課我坐在了前排。教授告訴我們這學(xué)期必須得讀五本書，他提供我們可供選擇的作者名單。隨后他緩步走上講臺(tái)，拿出課本，“貝克、布萊克、布魯斯、卡特、庫(kù)克…”為了寫下所有的名字，我不得不瘋狂的作著記錄。這時(shí)有人輕輕的拍我肩膀，坐在我后面的學(xué)生悄悄告訴我：“他在點(diǎn)名呢。”
3、Our university newspaper runs a weekly question feature. Recently, the question was: "Whose autograph would you most want to have, and why?" As expected, most responses mentioned music or sports stars, or politicians. The best response came from a freshman, who said, "The person who signs my diploma."
我們大學(xué)的校報(bào)開辦了一個(gè)每周一問(wèn)的專欄。上周的問(wèn)題是：“你最想要什么人的簽名?為什么?”和預(yù)計(jì)的一樣，大部分的回答都是歌星、體育明星或者政治家。但是，最優(yōu)秀的答案來(lái)自一個(gè)一年級(jí)新生，他說(shuō)：“在我畢業(yè)證上簽字的那個(gè)人。”
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