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超好玩的英語(yǔ)笑話
不看翻譯你能看懂一篇英語(yǔ)笑話嗎，下面跟著yjbys小編來(lái)試試哦。
One Side of the Case 一面之辭
A judge asked our group of potential jurors whether anyone should be excused, and one man raised his hand.
"I can't hear out of my left ear," the man told the judge.
"Can you hear out of your right ear?" the judge asked. The man nodded his head.
"You'll be allowed to serve on the jury," the judge declared. "We only listen to one side of the case at a time."
一位法官問(wèn)我們這群修補(bǔ)陪審員是否有人應(yīng)當(dāng)免權(quán)。一個(gè)人舉起了手。
“我的左耳聽(tīng)不見(jiàn)。”那人告訴法官。
“你的右邊耳朵聽(tīng)得見(jiàn)嗎?”法官問(wèn)道。那人點(diǎn)了點(diǎn)頭。
“你將被允許加入陪審團(tuán)，”法官宣布。“我們每次只聽(tīng)一面之辭。”
唯有我是司機(jī)
A short young man was running behind a bus which was full of passengers. But the bus still ran at a great speed.
"Stop, stop, " a passenger looked out of the window, and shouted at the young man, "you can't catch it ! "
"I must," the young fellow said, out of breath, "because I'm only driver of the bus.
在一輛滿載乘客的公共汽車后面，一位小個(gè)子青年在奔跑著。氣車仍在高速前進(jìn)。 “停下吧，”一位乘客把頭伸出窗子，對(duì)小個(gè)子喊道，“你追不上的!”
“我必須追上，”小個(gè)子氣喘吁吁地說(shuō)，“我是司機(jī)!”
a King from a Knave
George Ⅲ asked the once wellknown wit, Horne Tooke,whether he could play cards.Your Majesty, replied Tooke, I am a mere childwhere cards are concerned. I cannot even tell a King from a Knave.
喬治三世問(wèn)一度大名鼎鼎的才子霍恩圖克，會(huì)不會(huì)玩紙牌。陛下，圖克回答說(shuō)：在玩紙牌方面，我只不過(guò)是幼兒園的水平。我甚至分不清國(guó)王和無(wú)賴。
婚禮上有長(zhǎng)官在
A police stopped a motorist who was speeding on the street. "But officer," the man said, "I can explain.""Just be quiet," snapped the officer. "I'm going to put you in jail until the chief gets back.""But ,officer, I ….""I said to keep quiet! You are going to jail!"A few hours later, the officer looked in on his prisoner and said, "You are lucky because the chief is at his daughter's wedding. He'll be in a good mood when he gets back.""Are you sure?" answered the man in the cell. "I'm the groom."
大街上的一個(gè)超速駕駛者被警察攔住了。“但是警官”這個(gè)人說(shuō)道，“我可以解釋的”。“保持安靜”，警察突然說(shuō)道。“我將把你送往監(jiān)獄，直到長(zhǎng)官回來(lái)。“但是，警察，我……”。“我說(shuō)過(guò)了保持安靜，你要到監(jiān)獄了。”幾小時(shí)后，警察向監(jiān)獄里看了看說(shuō)道“算你運(yùn)氣好，因?yàn)槲覀兊拈L(zhǎng)官正在他女兒的婚禮上。他將帶著一個(gè)愉快的心情回來(lái)的。”“你確定”在牢房里的這個(gè)人說(shuō)道。“我就是新郎呀”。
摩西和耶穌
A burglar breaks into a house. He sees a CD player that he wants so he takes it. Then he hears a voice "JESUS is watching you". He looks around with his flashlight wandering "What The HELL Was That?". He spots some $ on a table and takes it......Once again he hears a voice " JESUS is watching you". He hides in a corner trying to find where the voice came from. He spots a birdcage with a parrot in it! He goes over and asks " Was that your voice?". It said "YES". He then says "What's your name?". It says "MOSES". The burglar says " What kind of person names his bird moses??" The parrot replys "THE SAME PERSON THAT NAMES HIS Rottweiler "JESUS".
一個(gè)竊賊潛入一戶人家。他看到一個(gè)喜歡的CD機(jī)，他趕緊拿了。就在這個(gè)時(shí)候他聽(tīng)到有人說(shuō)：“耶穌正在看著你。”他照著手電看來(lái)看去，嘀咕著：“到底是什么人在說(shuō)話?”這時(shí)，他看到桌子上有些錢，他又拿了。。。那聲音又來(lái)了：“耶穌正在看著你。”他躲到一個(gè)角落，想找出是誰(shuí)在說(shuō)話。結(jié)果看到一只鸚鵡，于是他問(wèn)鸚鵡：“是你在說(shuō)話嗎?”鸚鵡承認(rèn)了。 小賊說(shuō)：“你叫什么名字?”“摩西”。小賊說(shuō)：“什么人給鳥(niǎo)取這種名字?”鸚鵡回答：“就是那個(gè)給他的羅威那犬取名為‘耶穌’的那個(gè)人啊。”
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