英語(yǔ)笑話六則
導(dǎo)語(yǔ)：以下整理的冷笑話一般都超出常規(guī)的思維，不符合邏輯和生活實(shí)際，讓人聽了覺得一愣；雖然有些冷笑話挺好玩，但無論怎樣，這種笑話聽了也不會(huì)像那些聽“正常”笑話后一樣開懷大笑。更多英語(yǔ)笑話盡在應(yīng)屆畢業(yè)生笑話網(wǎng)。
The Climate of New Zealand
Teacher: Matthew, what is the climate of New Zealand?
Matthew: Very Cold, sir.
Teacher: Wrong.
Matthew: But, sir! When they send us meat it always arrives frozen!
新西蘭的氣候
老師：馬修，新西蘭的氣候怎么樣?
馬修：先生，那里的天氣很冷。
老師：錯(cuò)了。
馬修：可是，先生!從那兒運(yùn)來的豬肉都凍得硬邦邦的。
My Sister's Fingers
Teacher: Kevin, why are you late this time?
Kevin: Please sir, I bruised two fingers knocking in a nail at home.
Teacher: I don't see any bandages.
Kevin: Oh, they weren't my fingers! I told my little sister to hold the nail.
我妹妹的手指頭
老師：凱溫，這次你怎么又遲到了?
凱溫：對(duì)不起，老師，我在家釘釘子，砸壞了兩個(gè)手指頭。
老師：怎么沒有扎繃帶呀?
凱溫：噢，砸的不是我的手指頭，我叫小妹妹扶著釘子的。
All Except the Music
A keen young teacher wanted to introduce her class to the glories of classical music, so she arranged an outing to an afternoon concert. To make the occasion even more memorable, she treated everyone to lemonade, cake, chocs and ices. Just as the party was getting back into their coach, she said to little Sally, "Have you enjoyed yourself today?"
"Oh, yes, miss!" said Sally, "It was lovely. All except the music, that is."
除了音樂
一位熱心的年輕教師想讓她的學(xué)生多了解一點(diǎn)優(yōu)秀的古典音樂，就安排了一天下午去聽音樂會(huì)。為了使這次活動(dòng)能給大家留下更深的印象，她請(qǐng)大家喝檸檬汽水、吃點(diǎn)心、巧克力和冰淇淋。在大家回來上汽車的'時(shí)候，她問小薩莉：“你今天玩得好嗎?”
“噢，好極了，小姐，” 薩莉說，“除了音樂其它都很好。”
The plural Form of "Child"
Teacher: What is the plural of man, Tom?
Tom: Men.
Teacher: Good. And the plural of child?
Tom: Twins.
"孩子"的復(fù)數(shù)形式
老師：湯姆，‘男人’這個(gè)詞的復(fù)數(shù)形式是什么?
湯姆：男人們。
老師：答得好。那‘孩子’的復(fù)數(shù)形式呢?
湯姆：雙胞胎。
When Do People Talk Least?
Student A: When do people talk least?
Student B: In February.
Student A: Why?
Student B: Because February is the shortest month of a year.
人們什么時(shí)候說話最少?
學(xué)生甲：人們?cè)谑裁磿r(shí)候說話最少?
學(xué)生乙：在二月。
學(xué)生甲：為什么呢?
學(xué)生乙：因?yàn)槎率且荒曛凶疃痰囊粋�(gè)月。
The Reason of Being Late
Teacher: Johnny, why are you late for school every morning?
Johnny: Every time I come to the corner, a guidepost says, 'School -- Go Slow'.
遲到的原因
老 師：約翰尼，為什么你每天早晨都遲到?
約翰尼：每當(dāng)我經(jīng)過學(xué)校附近的拐角處，就見路牌上寫著‘學(xué)校-緩行’。
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