英語(yǔ)版笑話大全簡(jiǎn)短
當(dāng)聽(tīng)別人說(shuō)笑話的時(shí)候覺(jué)得不大好笑，還會(huì)覺(jué)得冷很冷，可是自己看的時(shí)候，卻笑到不行，你有這樣的經(jīng)歷么?以下的簡(jiǎn)短英語(yǔ)版笑話大全，希望能讓你歡樂(lè)笑不停。
英語(yǔ)版笑話大全簡(jiǎn)短一：我教老師
Mother asked her little boy, Darling, what did the teacher teach you today?
Nothing, Mum, answered the son proundly, instead, she asked me how much one plus two was, and I told her three.
母親問(wèn)她年幼的'兒子：寶貝，今天老師教了你些什么?
兒子驕傲地說(shuō)：什么都沒(méi)教，媽媽。她反倒問(wèn)我一加二等于幾，我告訴她等于三。
英語(yǔ)版笑話大全簡(jiǎn)短二：Do You Know Santa's True Profession?
Consider the following:
1. You never actually see Santa, only his "assistants."
2. Santa keeps his job until he decides to retire.
3. Santa doesn't really do the work; he directs a bunch of helpers to do all his work for him, but he's the one who everybody credits with the work.
4. Santa doesn't work a 40-hour week.
5. Santa travels a lot.
Santa is obviously a senior faculty member with tenure!
圣誕老人的真實(shí)職業(yè)是什么?
考慮以下幾點(diǎn)
1. 你其實(shí)從來(lái)沒(méi)見(jiàn)過(guò)圣誕老人，你看見(jiàn)的都是他得助手(他得助手真的好多，除了過(guò)圣誕節(jié)的所有父母外，還有職業(yè)“圣誕老人”)
2. 圣誕老人不想退休，就可以一直當(dāng)他的圣誕老人。
3. 圣誕老人不會(huì)做實(shí)事，他都是指揮一堆幫手幫他做完所有的事情，但是事情做得好還是不好，功績(jī)和責(zé)任都算圣誕老人的。
4. 圣誕老人實(shí)行的可不是朝九晚五雙休制。
5. 圣誕老人經(jīng)常旅行
圣誕老人顯然是一個(gè)高級(jí)職員(please, 這世界上還有比他的工作更好的工作嗎?)
英語(yǔ)版笑話大全簡(jiǎn)短三：誰(shuí)愚蠢
A teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, "Everyone who thinks you're stupid, stand up!"
Little Johnny then stood up.
The teacher said, "Do you think you're stupid, Johnny?"
"No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!"
一個(gè)老師在對(duì)學(xué)生們講心理學(xué)，“誰(shuí)認(rèn)為自己蠢就站起來(lái)?”她一開(kāi)始就說(shuō)。
小約翰尼站了起來(lái)。
“你認(rèn)為你很蠢嗎，小約翰尼?”老師問(wèn)。
“不是的，老師，我只是不喜歡看你一個(gè)人站著。”
英語(yǔ)版笑話大全簡(jiǎn)短四：He's just Been to the Zoo
When I was waitting in line at the bank , I noticed a woman holding a small child at one of the windows. The boy was eating a roll ,which he thrust at the teller. The teller smiled and shook his head.
"No, no, dear," said the boy's mom. and then , turnning to the teller , "I beg your pardon , young man. Please forgive my son . He's just been to the zoo."
他剛?cè)ミ^(guò)動(dòng)物園
當(dāng)我在銀行里排隊(duì)時(shí)，發(fā)現(xiàn)一位婦女抱著一個(gè)小孩站在一個(gè)窗口。男孩正在吃一個(gè)面包卷，并將面包卷戳向出納員，出納員笑著搖了搖頭。
“別這樣，親愛(ài)的，” 男孩的媽媽說(shuō)。然后她轉(zhuǎn)向出納員說(shuō)，“對(duì)不起，小伙子。請(qǐng)?jiān)徫业膬鹤樱麆側(cè)ミ^(guò)動(dòng)物園。”
英語(yǔ)版笑話大全簡(jiǎn)短五：A Girl's Wish
On the way home after watching a ballet performance, the kindergarten teacher asked her students what they thought of it. The smallest girl in the class said she wished the dancers were taller so that they would not have to stand on their toes all the time.
在觀看完芭蕾舞表演回家的路上，幼兒園老師問(wèn)學(xué)生的觀后感。班上最小的女孩說(shuō)，她希望舞蹈演員可以長(zhǎng)得更高一點(diǎn)兒，那么他們就不用整天踮著腳尖了。
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